The trap of vaccine

When AZ vaccination was open to volunteers in April, I was skeptical. When my husband asked if I wanted to sign up, I responded : How can both of us take the risk?

I was an complete idiot. Till today, I am still beating up myself for that bad decision and for saying such foolish things.

How things quickly turned around was out of my expectation.

I wanted to register for the 2nd round of AZ vaccination. I failed.

Many people I know managed to get it. That's when the frustration and regret started to set in.

Then as the government ramp up the vaccination, the people around - some much younger - are getting the vaccination. I still had no appointment.

I discovered that there were some problems of the MySejahtera app on Huawei phones that made the users unable to submit their details. I had to use my husband's phone to log in and submit the details. My address was only updated after I did that.

I bought a Huawei P40 last year. Another bad decision.

As I continue to berate myself of the list of bad decisions I made, more and more people are getting their vaccine. Mine was still status quo.

I started to feel angry. I felt like a kid back in kindergarten. It's something like the teacher was giving out treats to each child. When it came to my turn, the teacher was disrupted by another teacher. When she came back, she continued to hand out the treat to the next child. I was forgotten. I was seething in anger. Too proud to call out to the teacher that I have not received my treat. 

I am feeling left out, like somebody is out to get me. Trying to stop me from getting the vaccination.

I didnt expect an issue like this will expose all the negative feelings in me. 

I felt like a victim. It's tiring and pointless. 

Some positive things : my boss put me in the list to get the vaccination bought by Media Prima. He took the initiative to help when the people around me didnt bother to ask if I had got my vaccination. 

My friend Janice is suffering the same fate. I am not alone, at least not for now.